Faith

Few days back, a couple of my friends and I decided to go to a church. Not to pray, but to see if they would be interested in buying candles which are made by the blind and HIV+ women (its a part of Somaiya social cell's many activities). I saw that there were many families there, who had just finished mass, and were standing around chatting while their kids played. I wondered then.. India is a land of many religions. What was it that made people take time out and pray? People who all through the year complain of not having the time to pick up the phone to call a friend, or pick up their dry cleaning, somehow manage to visit the church\mosque\temple\gurudwara etc every week or at least during festivals and special ocassions to talk to the almighty.

I wondered then, how many people actually visited these places to talk to god? Did they come here because they believed in god, and wanted to pay their respects? Do they come here only when they want to make wishes? Or do they come here just because its a part of their tradition, and its a good place to meet people of the community?

Thats when I realised, there is a big difference between faith and religion. But what was faith?

Is faith the belief that things will get better? Is it a way to derive strength to go on when the road ahead is difficult? Is it a sign of weakness - the belief that there is somebody up there who will solve your problems for you, and so you need not face them yourself? Or is it fear - that there is someone you are answerable to, even after death, and so you need to follow a rightous path - and pray hard to apologise\negotiate when at times you deviate?

A friend of mine said that faith is confidence. In yourself, in your actions and in what is right. Another friend told me that he didn't know what it was, but he did have faith in his friend's abilities and talent, and knew that she would achieve something one day. Another told me that faith is believing in the good, the love in people - and that it is more powerful than anything else on the planet.

For me faith is the knowledge that I am never alone. When in dilemma, the voice inside my head helps me make a decision. When I am tempted to do something bad, it guides me back into the correct path. Even when I am misunderstood by all, and the whole world seems to be indifferent, I know that I am not alone. That voice in my head is constantly reassuring me that everything will be ok, and to stay strong. Faith to me is the doorway to hope, which is the driving force for life in this world.

So have faith people. It is not necessary for you to have faith in god always. But have faith in whatever you consider to be the ultimate test, or judge of you. It may be your conscience, your love, your freinds, your family, or your capabilities. It will hold your hand and lead the way for you when you are confused, and make you feel warmer even in the coldest of times. All of us need to have faith, so that we have the courage to take chances. Only then we can give life a chance to prove itself to us.

Who are we?

"Who are you?" asked a voice
"I am Anindita. An Mba student." "An ex-software engineer." "A daughter" "A friend" "Sombody's fiance" were some of the answers that ran through my head.
"Really??" asked the voice.

The truth is that I just don't know. Is it possible to define oureselves based on past achievements and relationships when we are in our 20's?? When we havent had much experiances, is it really correct to do so? But if not, then who really are we? How do we answer that question? With the new era of mobiles, internet, downloadable movies, and basically, too many things to do, are we losing ourselves? How do we know if we are living our life the way we are supposed to? And if all of us are more or less leading the same lifestyles, are we all the same people?

Its tough, to think about this. And vaguely unsettling. I'd gone last weekend to Karshid beach, with my friends in college. We were out on the beach till almost 3.00a.m. But as I sat alone, and watched the waves crash in and move closer to me, I pondered about this question. And I thought about a few things.

I am Anindita. I fear the ocean and its secrets. I fear heights and closed spaces. I am however strong enough to face my fears. I have many ambitions, but I am not really sure if I am capable of fulfilling all of them. I believe in God.I have great faith in destiny. I don't really fear life or death, cuz I know that God is up there, watching over me. On the external side, I love partying. When I party, I party hard. I never do the stuff I think is bad, even though other people may disagree. Similarly, I do whatever I like, regardless of public opinion. I am sarcastic and rude to most people. The people who know me, know that I will always be there for them. The people who hate me, know that I dont care a damn about them. I am carefree, independent and wild. Thats who I am.