Wednesday, December 30, 2009

Faith

Few days back, a couple of my friends and I decided to go to a church. Not to pray, but to see if they would be interested in buying candles which are made by the blind and HIV+ women (its a part of Somaiya social cell's many activities). I saw that there were many families there, who had just finished mass, and were standing around chatting while their kids played. I wondered then.. India is a land of many religions. What was it that made people take time out and pray? People who all through the year complain of not having the time to pick up the phone to call a friend, or pick up their dry cleaning, somehow manage to visit the church\mosque\temple\gurudwara etc every week or at least during festivals and special ocassions to talk to the almighty.

I wondered then, how many people actually visited these places to talk to god? Did they come here because they believed in god, and wanted to pay their respects? Do they come here only when they want to make wishes? Or do they come here just because its a part of their tradition, and its a good place to meet people of the community?

Thats when I realised, there is a big difference between faith and religion. But what was faith?

Is faith the belief that things will get better? Is it a way to derive strength to go on when the road ahead is difficult? Is it a sign of weakness - the belief that there is somebody up there who will solve your problems for you, and so you need not face them yourself? Or is it fear - that there is someone you are answerable to, even after death, and so you need to follow a rightous path - and pray hard to apologise\negotiate when at times you deviate?

A friend of mine said that faith is confidence. In yourself, in your actions and in what is right. Another friend told me that he didn't know what it was, but he did have faith in his friend's abilities and talent, and knew that she would achieve something one day. Another told me that faith is believing in the good, the love in people - and that it is more powerful than anything else on the planet.

For me faith is the knowledge that I am never alone. When in dilemma, the voice inside my head helps me make a decision. When I am tempted to do something bad, it guides me back into the correct path. Even when I am misunderstood by all, and the whole world seems to be indifferent, I know that I am not alone. That voice in my head is constantly reassuring me that everything will be ok, and to stay strong. Faith to me is the doorway to hope, which is the driving force for life in this world.

So have faith people. It is not necessary for you to have faith in god always. But have faith in whatever you consider to be the ultimate test, or judge of you. It may be your conscience, your love, your freinds, your family, or your capabilities. It will hold your hand and lead the way for you when you are confused, and make you feel warmer even in the coldest of times. All of us need to have faith, so that we have the courage to take chances. Only then we can give life a chance to prove itself to us.

Sunday, December 13, 2009

Who are we?

"Who are you?" asked a voice
"I am Anindita. An Mba student." "An ex-software engineer." "A daughter" "A friend" "Sombody's fiance" were some of the answers that ran through my head.
"Really??" asked the voice.

The truth is that I just don't know. Is it possible to define oureselves based on past achievements and relationships when we are in our 20's?? When we havent had much experiances, is it really correct to do so? But if not, then who really are we? How do we answer that question? With the new era of mobiles, internet, downloadable movies, and basically, too many things to do, are we losing ourselves? How do we know if we are living our life the way we are supposed to? And if all of us are more or less leading the same lifestyles, are we all the same people?

Its tough, to think about this. And vaguely unsettling. I'd gone last weekend to Karshid beach, with my friends in college. We were out on the beach till almost 3.00a.m. But as I sat alone, and watched the waves crash in and move closer to me, I pondered about this question. And I thought about a few things.

I am Anindita. I fear the ocean and its secrets. I fear heights and closed spaces. I am however strong enough to face my fears. I have many ambitions, but I am not really sure if I am capable of fulfilling all of them. I believe in God.I have great faith in destiny. I don't really fear life or death, cuz I know that God is up there, watching over me. On the external side, I love partying. When I party, I party hard. I never do the stuff I think is bad, even though other people may disagree. Similarly, I do whatever I like, regardless of public opinion. I am sarcastic and rude to most people. The people who know me, know that I will always be there for them. The people who hate me, know that I dont care a damn about them. I am carefree, independent and wild. Thats who I am.

Friday, October 30, 2009

Love

We look for it. We need it. We feel sad when we dont have it. People who cannot understand it are always lonely, sad and hence cruel. It eludes us. It hurts us. It confuses us. It enchants us. It fills us with a warmth so beautiful and magical that we dont notice the biting cold. It takes away our sleep. It is there on our minds, when we are pensive, alone and lost in thoughts.

What is it that makes us look for love? Some look for it in friendship, some in casual relationships. Others, who are intutive, believe in love at first sight and look for some guesture, mannerism or any sign from people which shows them that this is what they have been waiting for.

I believe that love only comes to those who are loving by nature. A selfish person cannot hope to find true love. True love only comes to those who are kind, generous and loving by nature. The Gita says that Wealth only comes to those who dont care for it much, are dispassionate towards materialistic joys, and know how to use whatever wealth they get for the betterment of humanity. Wealth does not come to those who desparately seek it for personal gains. The same also applies to Love. It cant be found. It can only be created and spread. And what you send to the world will come back to you, multifold.

So dont go looking for love. Love the people around you - your friends, family, society, even nature and its creations. Love your enemies too - it never hurts to forgive what is unimportant. It will heal you of your wounds and help you move on. And the magical experiance which you have been dreaming about will come to you. Wait for it to happen. Some things are best left to God. Life is like an ocean. If you try to fight it, you will drown. Have faith in fate, and let the current guide you. You will reach the beautiful shore, safe and sound.

Saturday, October 24, 2009

Somaiya Social Cell


I am a student of SIMSR, and I belong to the Social cell of this college. Its a pleasure and a privilege to be a part of this group.

We at Somaiya social cell, are a group of people who are tryng to make a difference. We believe that any difference, however little or big, is significant - as long as it helps to enrich somebody's life. We believe in equality, empowerment of the society, and social responsibility of every individual. It is these values that has brought us together. It is for them, that we get together, form groups, and think of projects to do that could help some part of the society.

I will now write briefly about few of our major projects. The first is Warli. Warli is a small village, about 150km from Mumbai. The members of this project travel there once in a month to meet the local artists there, who make some beautiful and special paintings. Our members take responsibilty to market these paintings in the city, sell them, and help the local artists. This is one of our most successful projects. Warli paintings are also sold at stalls conducted by us during special ocassions in colleges, malls etc.

Pehel - This project is a step to empowerment of the childeren belonging to lower income group families. I am an active member of this project. We work together to educate the children of construction workers in our campus. We teach them English, Maths and Hindi. Many of these children's parents cannot afford to send them to English medium schools. It is a challenging and a critical project, and I have learned a lot personally, from this project.

Sahas - this is a project that aims at helping women afflicted by AIDS or HIV+ women by teaching them vocational courses so that they can earn their livelihood and lead an independent life. I must say here - it is very disappointing, to know that even though India is in the 21st century, and dreams of being a superpower, the stigma against employment of HIV+ and AIDS afflicted patients exist. This is truly one of the social evils in the society.

SMS - This project aims at selling products made by blind workers, widows, and eco friendly products and handing over the proceeds to them. This project was hugely successful at selling Eco-friendly Ganeshas during the Ganesh Chaturthi festival in late sptember'2009.

In addition to these long term projects, Social cell at Somaiya also has undertaken other short term projects, like clean up of the Juhu beach last year.

We believe that to be a successful manager, in addition to studies, it is essential to gain some first-hand experiance of handling projects, innovation, logistics etc. Social Cell gives us a way to achieve this. Also, to be successful in one's life, what is most important, is to be a good human being. To be someone, who can think compassionately about other people, understand them, and try to resolve their problems. Someone, who can look at the world in an objective way, and make it a better place. As the Gita tells us, wealth only comes to one who uses it for the betterment of people. Happiness comes to the person who strives to make people around him\her happy. That is the true aim of an MBA, and that is what we at social cell hope to achieve.

Sunday, October 18, 2009

Holidays

Its holiday time now. Our college has conceeded to grant us 2 weeks vacation, on the joyous vacation of diwali, plus (we think) due to the fact that Mumbai is usually unbearably hot during october.

I spent the 1st week blissfully at home. Home sweet home. Where my mother and father take care of everything, and care about the same things I do. Where everything is warm and familiar and welcoming. Where the day starts with the smell of delicious toast and eggs. Where the familiar scents of childhood make you feel happy and peaceful .. like the scent of breakfast, the scent of your bed, the scent of mom's perfume, the scent of our own cupboard....mmm... heavenly. Home... where u realise everytime you are there that you can never have enough of it, that its where your heart is and always will be, where you feel secure, and protected. Home.. where you always want to be and always wonder at the choices you made that drove you away from home. After this visit, I have realised 2 things - That "Home sweet home" is the most underrated saying, and secondly, I will live here as long as I can.. untill I can find another place to call home. No reason to stay away is ever good enough, and no matter howmuch we stay at home, it never feels enough. Leaving home is always heartbreaking.. to look at mom's sweet loving face and trying to smile bravely, fighting back uncontrollable sobs. To look at Dad's sad face, who out of the love in his heart will gladly drag heavy bags down the stairs even though he is old and frail, and shouldnt really be doing it.. cuz in his eyes we will always remain the tiny gurgling lump that was presented to him by the nurses in the hospital many years ago. Home is where I belong, and I have made a resolution that I will return to live there as soon as I can. Parents are our gifts from god, and they should be loved, cared for and cherished every single day. We can never be too old to live away from them... and people who keep their parents in old age homes... well i ll never understand those guys. I am and always will be, attached to their apron strings, will always be their little girl, and will always need them in my life. My parents are the best any child can have, and I feel blessed each day to be their daughter.

Diwali is the festival of lights. I am celebrating it here at bangalore, with my sis, jiju and my sweet little nephew. Sis is all about "crackers cause pollution, etc etc", but we convinced her that easily available and cheap eco friendly crackers are still on their way, and untill then, there's no point in depriving her son of the joy. I ve always wondered why crackers in India are not sold and marketed more.. Indians do have a lot to celebrate. Cricket victories, tennis victories, crop victories, weddings, functions, etc.. it could be a bigger market that it is now. 75% of their sales is only through Diwali.. I think the fireworks industry in India has a huge potential.

Signing out now ... :) Happy diwali :D

Saturday, October 3, 2009

Family

I dont know how to start this blog. But I do know that it has to be written, as its one of the main chapters in my life, one of those which define me.

My family is my biggest strenghth. They give me love, affection, hope, warmth and security. The feeling that I am not alone, that even if the whole world is against me , can come only through them. They take care of me when I am ill, correct me when I am wrong, hold me when I am sad, praise my every virtue, celebrate my triumphs, and are always with me. Even though I may be far away from them, their essence will always be with me. That's how I feel when I meet my relatives, and family friends.. that I am never away from home.

The place where I grew up.. I met many people. Most of them hate meeting their relatives.. but do so due to an obligation of a social or some other kind. They feel that their relatives are always competing with them, interfering in their personal lives, and in general, are not very pleasant. I feel blessed that I have never felt that way so far about any of my relatives. Since none of them stay in the city where I spent 20 years of my life, and the fact that my life was always full of exams, tutions and later on, work, I never really had the time to meet them or know them. I used to feel sad and I cherished all the moments I spent with them, rare as they were.

Then the decision to come to Mumbai to do MBA was taken. It was the first time I was moving away from home. It felt surreal.. like I was leaping off the safe edge into an abyss. My father sensed my feelings. He took me to Mumbai, and introduced me to our family friends who live here . Also he gave me the numbers of my aunt and my cousin, and I was told by all of them to visit as often as I could and that I could always depend on them.

And I am so grateful that it happened. Now everytime I miss home, or feel the need for family, where people genuinely care aboout me, are not playing any games, and treat me like one of their own, I visit them. I love being with them, and I love spending time at their homes. I feel like my parents are next to me, and watching out for me. I feel blessed to have such relatives, and I feel more blessed to have such wonderful parents, who people love and adore so much that they will take out their precious time for their crazy daughter.

Diwali vacation is coming, and I am dying to meet my parents again. Also my sweet baby nephew, my dear sister and my brother-in-law, one of the few people who I both adore and respect. I cant wait to be with them again. Separation has only made me realise more that I can never stay away from my parents .. that I'll always be their little girl, and no matter how old I grow, I'll always need them. Parents are the most precious gifts from god, we must always treasure them. Care for them, respect them, and value them.

And of course... him. He is the love of my life, with who I want to spend the rest of my life with. When I am with him, I feel as secure as I do with my parents. After my parents are gone, only he can fill that void, and can prevent me from falling apart. He is my hero and my prince, my true soulmate. I am waiting longingly for the day when we take our vows and our lives get joined forever. He is the one, my hope, my faith..........my future family.

Tuesday, September 29, 2009

Infatuation

Infatuation. It is defined (by me, as i have no time to quote other people) as the state of mind when a person covets a person, object or state of life very badly and changes his\her behaviour to what he\she feels would help him\her achieve it. Whew!! I bored myself by this. Let me see if I can write anything better.

Ahh. Infatuation is mostly commonly used to describe "crushes".. those flutters in our hearts when we meet someone who, by our standards, is simply too amazing, sweet or irresistable. Usually, looks are the main criteria for producing this state of mind. I allow myself to go off into a tangent here and remember my first crush... It was Hrithik Roshan in KNPH when
I was 14... Ahh....how I hated and cursed my braces then...

Where was I?? Yes.. crushes. When we wait for that special someone each day to appear beofre us. When any sign of recognition from that person makes us feel like we have attained nirvana. When our sole existence seems to depend on that 1 person's attention. When we dress, talk, walk, eat and sleep to impress that one person. And when they come in front of us, we suddenly become aware of things like how long and stupid our arms must look, or whether we have combed our hair, or that comfy T-shirt which . is really stupid, or !!! Yipes!!! Did we remember to spray on deo??? When we feel that if we get the love of that 1 person, we will be happy forever , and will need nothing further from life.

One would assume that infatuation of this sort is usually under one's control, and is restricted to teenage. After gaining experiance and wisdom, one appreciates the value of a true and honest relationship, and thus, makes few mistakes later due to infatuation, they ultimately get into a deep, meaningful relationship.

This, sadly isn't the case. Look at all the people around you. Some people have a penchant for complicating their lives. Even though they are in a relationship, which probably took god only knows, how many sleepless nights, scheming and wondering with friends, sweaty hand shakes, shy flurried glances, hours spent in deciding the "right look", or in some worse cases, marriage!!etc etc, they will still let their minds wander in other directions after a while, and look at newer pastures, and the whole cycle repeats, This time with a new complication - what do we do with the one we have already???

Infatuation does not limit itself to the heart alone. It extends to almost every sphere of life... anything that people are capable of complicating. It extends to friendships, career decisions, higher studies, businesses, entertainment, etc.

Take us (me, and my peers at my B-skool) for example. When we first joined MBA course, we were all brimming with enthusiasm and joy. We were all determined to excel and shine in everything, be it placements, classroom discussuons, exams, presentations, committees... the works. Everybody was punctual to ever class, everybody wanted to be a part of everything and anything, everyone wanted to do everything all at once and were ready to lose sleep over it. And we did. There was so much particaipation in every damn thing, that seniors had to conduct full fledged interviews (with 3-4 rounds) for committee memberships, we had to have polls conducted in class for electing the Class and subject representatives. And the attendance.... so full that it was impossible to get a decent place to sit if one had the misfortune to be late.

And now. The infatuation is over, the illusions are gone. Hardly anyone attends class. No one attends the meetings of any of the committees they had joined with so much enthusiasm. When they finally do, they are late, moaning and groaning, and reluctant to the point of annoyance. Today was the 1st day of the new trimester. No one wanted to be an SR. The existing ones wanted to renounce their posts.

What causes this? Is it that we attach too many expectations when we venture into something? Is it that the thing that we coveted so much was wrongly pscyhed before us by other people that we get so infatuated in the first place? When we like something so much, and work so hard for it, why is it that after a while, its all gone, like a dream? What kind of people are we, that we dont honour our decisions after we take them, or dont listen to our hearts before making those decisions?? Why do we complicate our lives so??

Saturday, September 26, 2009

Happy Dusshera

Dusshera time. And end of exam time. Truly a glorious time. The best days are when you have completed a trimester and you are at the beginning of a short (or long) holiday. beginnings are always the best. They make you feel that you have so much time to do all the things you had planned to, but couldn't. They make you feel fresh and joyful. Everybody, including the meanest, crabbiest person is happy.

Dusshera marks a new beginning too. The end of evil and the beginning of a new era. When Lord Rama killed Ravana, and good won over evil. It marked the beginning of hope, happiness and a beautiful life. This festival is to remind us all that good always wins over evil, and no matter how powerful bad times are or how long they seem to be, when we tackle them, victory and light are sure to prevail.

Today was an awesome day. I went out to lokhandwala with my friends and we saw the pooja there. We offerred our prayers through the "pushpanjoli" (a prayer that is offerred through flowers). Then we ate a sumtuous bhog. The pooja was hosted by Abhijeet Bhattacharya, all humble and modest, and being a good host. The idols of the goddess Durga, in her "Mahishaasura mardhini" avataar was stunning. So were the idols of Lord Ganesha, Goddess Lakshmi, Lord Karthik and Goddess Saraswathi. They were beautifully decorated and devotedly garlanded. Durga is the goddess of war. She is the symbol of a woman's power and will. On this day, we worship her for strenght and will. So that we too can stand up to evil and fight for the truth, wisdom and values. So that, in our everday life, when confronted with wrong things and doubts whether to tackle it, we have the strenght to fight.

Then we did some shopping. Overall, other than the dreadful heat, it was an awesome day :)
Dinner time now ....

Saturday, September 19, 2009

Sundays

Sunday. The best day of the week. The day when u feel relaxed and free as u have completed all ur chores and today is the day u finally get to urself. Some read, some sleep, some of the outgoing types go and meet friends, some extra outgoing types have a party. But no matter who you are, Sunday is always that day when you take time off for yourself , and become who you really are.

Not everybody though. Certainly not hotel management staff, waiters, cooks, sales people, store managers and workers, labourers, doctors, nurses, call centre employees and IT employees .. many of these guys work on Sundays too. Not to forget , bus conductors, drivers, train\engine drivers, railway staff, servants, etc. For these guys, Sunday is just another day.

And as far as today is concerened, me. Every student has that day b4 the exams when they realise that all thier planning after the last exam somehow never happened, and they suddenly find themselves standing in between an abyss full of things to study and complete (and I am not talking about toppers here. Remember guys, u are toppers cuz u DONT belong to the crowd). Today is that day for me. I have too much to do, and too little time. The fact that its a Sunday, and not just any Sunday, Dusshera time Sunday, isnt helping one bit. Anyways, I gotta try and clear as much of the load I can.

Wish me luck guys....


Wednesday, September 16, 2009

I am back

Was away for a long time. I had gone to Goa with the love of my life and some other friends on a holiday. Holidaying and partying with the people you love is definitely the most wonderful thing in the world. And in a place like Goa - well its like we are bang in the middle of paradise with angels singing to us our favourite songs.
I started in a gigantic hurry on Thursday afternoon - had to rush through my classes, which dragged on till 2 p.m, struggle to get a gate pass from our hostel warden - a real AAAAAARRRRRRRGGGGH in the worst of times. Then i had to drag my bags (thankfully i had the sense to pack the night b4) till the main gate (a good .6 km) until i got an auto and then i left for the airport. I freshened up, gobbled down a chicken burger and then got into my flight.

The flight was brilliant. It was a light cloudy evening, and I was flying above the blue-green Arabian sea through puffy clouds which were in different shapes (there was one shaped like godzilla with its claws stretched) and the setting sun's rays refracted off them in all directions, making the whole scene a sight for sore eyes. I landed in Goa airport an hour later, and then i took a cab to Baga.

I met him there. All of us freshened up, dressed casually in slacks and then went off to Brittos, which was recommended to us by the hotel manager. We had a great evening there.. we partied hard and had an excellent time.

The next day, much to the great surprise of the manager we were awake by 8 a.m. We ate a hearty breakfast, and after renting a couple of activas, we set out to hit the beaches. The first one, Arambul, was a good 20km away. But the view and the ride was simply awesome. It was like a bursting of greenery, well kept roads, and the glittering sparkling sea in the bright sun dazzled all of us.

At Arambul, we ate at a shack, where the host have us the most exquisite fish curry and fries we had ever tasted. It was spicy, juicy and yummy. We also feasted off chicken and parathas, to finish with tasty masala chai, that was a Goan speciality. We spent some time on the beach clicking pics. But the beach was too dirty for us to venture into the water. Its hard to understand how people can feel like dirtying such beautiful places with food, cans, plastic bags and rubbish. Cleanliness is next to godliness, and people should always remember that no matter how much money u have or how many branded stuff u own, true class shows through your habits. If you are filthy, then no amount of money or godliness can make you a better person.

By now it was burning hot, and I realised that i had forgotten my beloved Lakme sunscreen lotion :( We tried to buy some local brand, applied it and then set off again. this time we visited Vagatora and Anjuna. They were gorgeous, but almost totally ruined by the groups of locals who ll keep pestering you to but accessories or tattoos.

After this tiring day we trudged back to the hotel and snored for about 2 hrs. Then we got ready again and went out to Cape Town Cafe, where we partied and had a great time with foosball and music.

The next day we visited the fort where DCH was filmed. It was a lovely place, but sooooo much exercise to reach the top :( :( Totally exhausted we headed back 2 the hotel again. After completing our packing, we went to the beach and enjoyed the rest of the evening with good food, wine and music.

The next day all of us had to leave early. He and the others came to drop me off at the station. It was a very sad departure, both of us were feeling very sad that our beautiful holiday had come to an end.

And now I am back to the life of exams, classes, ppts, n more ppts :( :( Still.. i guess life goes on. Will be back soon later

Monday, September 7, 2009

Solitude

I am sure all of us have gone through those days when we wish that the world would just come to an end.. that we could just give up everything. Today is one of those days for me.

I wish things were easier. That everything wasn't so damn difficult. I wish that the earth would stop spinning just once, for me, or all of us out there who do the mistake of expecting too much from ourselves and hence from others, so that we could have the time to cry and lick our wounds. I wish that I could go away to a magical land far far away where there was just me and nature, and god, where I could have a final, deep conversation with him.

But unfortunately this cant happen. We all have to get along, and so do I. Probably this is the only worst and best thing about life.. that it always moves ahead, and takes you along.

Saturday, September 5, 2009

My first blog

Its the first time I am blogging. well not the first, I have done it before on Yahoo, but I wasnt very serious at that time.

I have just finished watching the telugu horror movie "Arundhati". It was a really good movie. It was about the struggle of a warrior princess with a psychopath. The classic war between right and wrong, love and hate, light and darkness. Amazing movie with good graphics and a gripping story.

But this movie has provided interesting insights to the film industry. the film industry in the south which was male dominant, and in most of which there always had to be a man to save the woman, is changing. This movie and its stupenduous success, along with others like Anasooya marks the beginning of a new era. An era in which women are respected and accepted as authority figures. An era in which women can be accepted in roles of a protector, a ruler and a warrior, but at the same time, she's not manly(to show as an explanation to her roles, as the other movies like Tomb raider did before). She is a loving, caring mother, beautiful and radiant. Bollywood could take a leaf out of the books of such brilliant directors to make more sensible movies.

Thats all for today :) Have to finish loads of work now